point of satiaton
Thursday, March 27, 2008i think i am completely healed from my infatuation syndrome. i no longer fancy chuva (that much). i think i have reached that point when i had so much kilig and then finally realizing that it’s really nothing. this has been the most intense infatuation i’ve had in three years.
it’s not a good feeling when you lose a burning desire for something. when you lose your passion for anything that consumes your thoughts and your energy, it feels as if you’ve just donated tons and tons of blood. you feel a bit light headed and languid.
targeting something gives you a certain rush. losing the appetite to achieve the target drains the life out of you.
rapleaf
Monday, March 24, 2008it’s just another manic monday… oooohhh….wish it were holiday….ooohhh… 
i have nothing to do today… well, that’s what i think. so i spent the entire morning doing investigative research. hahaha. in other words i wasted my time stalking people i know. it was really a waste of time because i did not find any juicy information. 
rapleaf.com is my latest tool in doing investigative research. just type the email address of the person you are stalking and viola you will be provided links to the networking sites that they are a member of.
well, i found out that people have a habit of signing up for several networking sites that they don’t really use, myself included. i have signed up for 7 online communities that i hardly visit. friendster is still the most common networking site. almost all the emails that i tried had friendster accounts. yun lang, i’m just bored.
small world! :)
Monday, March 17, 2008my just for kicks entries are supposed to be about things that i intentionally do to have fun. this time, i did not do anything but had a great, great time. here are the reasons why:
-
i was prepared to be disappointed in a meeting but i was so wrong. no need to sulk yahoo!
-
he noticed my dress and i quote: "kahit ano pang ibebenta mo bibilin ko." hahahaha. the dress is worth every penny. hehe.
-
i went to see my mds family whom i haven’t seen since i left the office last year. i wasn’t supposed to go because of the change in venue but i’m so glad i did.
-
i think the zen feel of ssc’s house channeled the positive energy that is making me smile until now. background: the initial plan was to meet at dolce. i haven’t been there but thought it was okay since it’s near abs which is sort of near up. so when they said we would meet in acropolis instead i was sort of unwilling to go. but thanks to the mighty hand of fate, a classmate brought me there.
-
it’s refreshing to see a happily married couple.
-
i found out that my previous officemate/boss and chuva are friends. small world! she texted him and then he called and then we talked. he sent a lot of texts which we (my mds family and i) enjoyed reading together. i’m so happy that my mds friends are as kilig as i was. they’re the ones who named him chuva. hahaha!
because i had so much fun, i didn’t feel the tension of wearing high heels from 6am to 2am the next day. i’m happy!
kids nowadays
Monday, March 10, 2008i was extremely shocked when my 7 year old niece accidentally mentioned that she has a crush. we were playing penpen de sarapen type of games and there was this game where the "it" has to say the first letter of her crush’s name. i wasn’t paying attention but when she said "s" i was like what!?! you have a crush!?! she then immediately retracted her statement, she picked a random letter daw. yeah right… tsk. tsk. tsk.
later in the afternoon, i heard her murmuring something while playing with her barbie ring. i listened closely and she was whispering, "will you marry me?" marriage? you’re jusy 7, kiddo!
when i was 7, i only cared about my assignments, watching okay ka fairy ko, and playing nintendo and luto-lutuan. kids are so different now. they act like teenagers as such an early age. is it what they watch or are they just too psychologically advanced now that they mature easily? scary.
the nerve!
i almost got fooled by a man who’s playing the field. i feel insulted but relieved. that sob actually thought that he could fool me. wtf! looking at the bright side, i feel relieved that i didn’t fall into his trap. somehow it made me feel that i have wisened up a bit.
i went to this place to meet a couple of people and it so happened that their team was also there. after a while, here comes a woman who according to the tsismosas around was his girlfriend! huwat! if i got carried away by his sweet words, i could have been his mistress. that prick!
i thought he was matino. i thought he wasn’t capable of being a two-timing ass. he doesn’t have the right to be, ya know. *evil grin* good for me i have emotionoal baggage. having open wounds saved me from more trouble.
lawsuit funding
Thursday, March 6, 2008there was this one time that i almost got a traffic violation for attempting to beat the red light. i had to drive my mom to deliver the printing stuff for a client. it was my first encounter with a traffic officer so i really didn’t know how to handle the situation. i didn’t want to be cited for a violation so i took the easiest way out. i showed my senate id, made an excuse about being late for a senate hearing and viola, i walked away unscathed. yep, i’m so corrupt!
anyhoo, i remember my professor’s story about going to court for a traffic violation. he said he missed a day of work to attend the hearing which he won by the way. good thing, the hearing took only a day but what if someone is involved in a lawsuit that takes forever to be settled. this will definitely cost a lot and will definitely affect one’s work. it is during this type of crisis that a pre-settlement loan would come in handy. for more details, visit http://www.fundmycase.com/en/index.php4.
:)
Wednesday, March 5, 2008pardon me for this post. i’m just trying to make my mba life a little more fun.
i have a crush on one of my mba classmates. yey! i just realized this last week and of course last tuesday, i grabbed every opportunity to glance, actually not just glance but stare, at him. haha! of course there were times that he would catch me looking so i would slowly look away. within that few seconds that we’re both looking at each other, i can feel my heart pound. hahahaha!
he looks apathetic. he doesn’t have that many facial expressions. but he smiles every once in a while. he doesn’t talk much. actually, i haven’t really heard him talk. he said something in class once about activity-based costing but i didn’t pay attention then. i checked his friendster profile (yes, i’m a stalker.) and i found out that he’s older and he’s single. he’s perfect! haha. as if!
yun lang. i just wanted to share my super babaw kilig moments. slack time in the office doesn’t do me good. haha.
drama interrupted
Monday, March 3, 2008most of the time, i find myself debating with myself when confronted with anger or despair. i ask if feeling angry or agonizing over something is worth it. i weigh the pros and the cons of feeling the feeling, and the logic behind the reason for feeling that feeling.
for example, something triggered my angry buttons, i’ll ask myself why i feel angry and resolve if being angry is logical. i ask, am i just being dramatic or is it reasonable to feel angry? if i can’t resolve whether i’m just being a drama queen, i then proceed with weighing the pros and the cons of being angry. i ask myself if i’ll be better off being angry or if i’m better off ignoring the trigger. i bother myself with the never-ending so what question. in weighing the pros and the cons i ask, eh ano naman ngayon? may mapapala ka dyan ha? more often than not, the resolution is i would be better off dead. haha. but seriously, i realize after evaluating the triggers and the emotions themselves, i feel that it’s better not to "emote".
it works, i think. however, sometimes i wonder if this kind of defense mechanism is emotionally healthy. i still feel intense anger or intense despair from time to time pero lagi nauudlot because i analyze in efforts to stay logical. but is it logical to rationalize a feeling? or are feelings naturally irrational thus i should just embrace it without question? *sigh*
