my adhd dilemma

i think i have something like adhd.  i find it difficult to concentrate on one thing for a long period of time.  at work, i can’t do just one thing.  when i do research, i get bored when i browse only for the research topic.  i have to open a lot of tabs for my other surfing needs.  after a certain period of time devoted to researching and surfing, i have this urge to do something else or something more, basta something different.  and since there’s nothing else left for me to do, in front of the computer that is, i get really, really bored. 

when i study, i can’t read assigned cases or readings for a long period of time.  i would have to watch television o kaya every few minutes i would think of food.

my mind is all over the place.  i want to always multi-task.  i have to keep my mind preoccupied with a lot of stuff all the time otherwise i get bored and then eventually it leads to frustration.  i think there are two possible explanations for my adhd dilemma:

explanation # 1: i just get bored easily period

explanation # 2:  i am not in my area of interest.  i can’t sustain my attention because i’m not that interested in the things that i’m involved in. 

i don’t think it’s the first explanation so something can be done about this dilemma.  i just have to find a way to get to that field that interests me.  forces of nature, please, please, please send me an opportunity so i can get there.

heaven

a couple of weeks ago, i told my officemate that she smells terrific (sounds like a commercial hehehe).  she remembered that compliment and last friday she asked me to smell a bottle of perfume.  she asked whether that was the scent i liked however i no longer remember.  anyway, she asked if i liked that scent and i said yes.  apparently her aunt sent her a dozen of those so this morning i had a package of gap heaven - body spray, lotion, and shower gel, waiting for me at my desk.  

it pays to compliment generous people. yey!

ungenerous patron

when everything appears bleak and depressing, is there an aspect in our life that is somehow in a better condition?  or is the when it rains it pours apply - either everything sucks or everything rocks?

last night jo and i spent our dinner whining about our career frustrations. we’re both unhappy about the way things are going at work but for different reasons.  i just won’t elaborate as i don’t want to think about it now. i’m too tired sulking about it.  the good side is, we didn’t talk about our usual dilemma concerning our personal lives.  yeah right!  as if career issues are not as depressing.

life hasn’t been generous lately.  i wonder why?  i hope there’s a good reason behind it and not just a life’s lesson thing. 

….

this has been the nth time that i’ve been trying to post something and yet i come up with nothing.  i have so much that i want to write about but my thoughts are too disorganized to write.