anyway, we were asked by the trainer to think of four roles that we have on separate pieces of paper.  and then she asked us to tear the role that we think we would give up first until there was only one piece of paper left.  she then asked us if that was role that we were spending most of our time.  there were attendees who realized that they were not spending time on that role that they considered was most important to them.  but in my case, what was left was my role as a career woman and yes, i am really spending probably 80% of my time working. 

it’s a good thing that i know what my priorities are.  i am spending time on what i think is important to me right now and that is my career.  then i realized that my career is my priority because that is what i need right now but that is not my priority in life.  so that made me ask myself, is it worth it?  am i missing out on other important things that would allow me to really live life fully?

i’m on fourth month on the job.  i did not expect for compensation and everything related to people’s salaries to be so tricky and messy.  the policies are not as black and white as it should be.  the computation is the easy part (what a surprise!), it is the why behind the computation that can get you in trouble. 

employees’ reactions are also a puzzle to me.  they can flare out when you don’t expect them to.  they misconstrue things even if you went out of your way to help them.  geez!  i was never like that with my salary.  i never question my payslip.  i never analyze and overanalyze my salary siguro kasi maliit lang haha!

anyway, i am hoping that i will get the hang of it.  i am really out of my comfort zone.  i am used to having my own say on how i should do things.  now i realize that when other people’s money is involved you can’t always decide on your own.  i get really frustrated at times because it seems that i don’t have the control that i used to have.  i think it is also because i am in an unfamiliar territory.  i never imagined this career change to have such a huge impact.  but i don’t want to think of the long run for now.  the dust will eventually settle.  i just want to get pass through this learning and adjustment stage.